Hi to those of you popping back to see if I am back and functioning. I am but on different levels at present as I am coping with being robbed of my mother.
Since I last blogged, my sister and I have been to Atlantic Canada and New Zealand.
Sadly our mother who four months ago was independent and fully functioning has had to be put into full hospital care. The cruel thing about all this is that she had no stroke, no heart attack, no debilitating illness, only a fall in which she broke her arm and fully recovered from.
So the laughing, loving mother I left in June, who at 86 was driving her own car, cooking, gardening, and caring for herself and taking an active interest in life is gone, leaving a little wizened, vague, fully dependent person in her place. After her fall it was like she folded her wings and surrendered her old life. Depression and mild dementia, and physical frailty are the medical diagnosis. Only one of which can be treated.
Sadly, another cruel twist that fate has in store for her are lucid moments. This is when her condition distresses her, panic attacks set in and she needs constant reassurance that we will leave her where she is and not make her go home. The up side here is that she loves where she is and the people caring for her. The down side, she gets upset that my brother (who lives in Australia) and I haven't been to see her. She doesn't recall either of us being there with her. Or the visit of one of my daughters and her great grandson. Luckily I had the forethought to take photos of us all with her and stuck them on her wardrobe door so she can see we were all there.
It is very distressing being told she will never return to any resemblence of her old life , then having to go into her lovely home and dismantle a life time of her memories.
My advice, for what it is worth, is make sure you enjoy what time you have with your parents. Ring them today and tell them you are thinking of them and how much you love them and appreciate what they have done for you. Tomorrow might be too late.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
8 comments:
Oh Robyn, I'm so sorry to hear about your mother. It's scary how quickly things like that happen. I hope things work out for both of you.
HUGS
Oh, Robyn. I know exactly what you are facing and it's hard. I dread the day when it'll be my own parents.
Hugs from me and the band.
My dad was kind of very active one day, next day he fell down and had a hip bone fracture. Next we know he was gone within 11 days. We were not prepared and it hit us hard.
Hope things get on better. Hugs!
I'm sorry to hear about your mom. I hope things work out for both of you. Hugs.
My mother is quickly headed the way of yours. I'd like to add, not only should you appreciate the time you have with your parents, but with anyone close to you.
Hi - I've popped over from Christine's blog. Sorry to hear about the strange turn of events for you and your family. I agree with everyone about taking the time to stop the whirlwind of life and enjoy who you have with you.
My dad passed away this past March. At Thanksgiving dinner yesterday, my cousin's wife was thinking of taking classes, then didn't know if that seemed foolish. I found myself saying, 'Life is for living. Do it!' Try to keep your heart open to the treasures and insights into your mother that you'll find as you handle her affairs. I wish you strength.
Thanks for all the support. I guess in cases like this you do your grieving before they physically depart this earth which makes it hard. Julia, I agree. It is amazing what little treasures I have found in going through Mum's things... a love letter to her from my Dad the eve of their wedding. I never thought of him as a young romantic. Then a letter from a rejected suitor of my Great Grandmother on announcing her engagement to my g.grandfather.
Robyn - I'm so sorry about your mom. It must be so hard being so far away. My own sweet mother is 87 and still functioning wonderfully, but I know that at any time, any day, I could get the call...
Lighting a candle for you.
Post a Comment